In Plain Engel-ish

Now that I have oodles of spare time, thanks to hiding away from COVID, I have done the math (something we English majors usually avoid) and discovered that I have lectured in forty-seven states (forty-eight if you count the State of Exhaustion) on so many writers but especially on Charles Dickens, my favorite author.Before the pandemic temporarily made my lecturing career as dead as the authors I lecture on, I had been delighted to address hundreds of groups and enjoyed visiting countless new cities. But the inconveniences, complexities, and complications of daily air travel, even pre-COVID, make my career a...

This essay first appeared in the "My Turn" column of Newsweek magazine on June 21, 1982. The editors wanted it to appear in mid-June because they felt it had an oblique connection to Father's Day. I had sent this same essay to Newsweek the year before, and it was rejected immediately.  When I came upon it a year later when cleaning out a desk drawer, I thought about revising it but, being rushed for time, I simply sent it in again with no changes. Amazingly, it was accepted. The editor explained that she had just been promoted to the position...

I’ve been an avid talker since age two, and I always suspected that I could make a career involving what a teacher once called my “virtuosity with sheer verbosity.” I remember a traveling salesman named Mr. Medlicott who frequently called at my father’s hosiery store and introduced me early to the joy of word play. He delighted me with riddles such as: “What is the only state name that contains a word and its opposite?” CONNECTiCUT, of course. And when I told him of my plans in college to become an English major, he asked: “Really, dear boy — in...

Writing an essay about humor is no joke. And therein lies the problem. We all love to hear a good joke; many of us love to tell a good joke; but none of us would ever want to explain a good joke. In fact, if it's a good joke, it should require no explanation. When we have to look at a footnote to understand why something is funny, well, then — let's face it, it just "ain't." And so I begin this essay with an apology for having to analyze a type of literature as seemingly spontaneous and transparent as...

Many of you who traveled abroad with me know that Dr. LeRoy King and I conducted over fifty Learning Travel trips abroad through Dickens Destinations from 1982 through 2012. All those tripscertainly impressed me with the amazing linguistic talents of those in the foreign travel industry.From guides to waiters to maids, most non-native English speakers not only spoke and understood English but usually German, French, and Italian as well. And they were certainly aware of the linguistic limitations of their English-speaking tourists. I heard them recite more than once this riddle: “What do you call a person who speaks three...